Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
