I am puke
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
