I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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