I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
