I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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