in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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