all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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