I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
