WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you win again, gameday.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
how drunk are you?
Several
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
