Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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