fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
