one might say we're banned from that church
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
