she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
