My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
