Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
