in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
