Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
