I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
So many bounce houses so little time
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
