Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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