if i can run in heels then i can drive
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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