Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
