I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
