You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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