She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
He has the fingertips of a God
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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