So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
