jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Someone shit on the floor
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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