I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
