No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
