I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
