found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
