it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
