goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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