You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
we're making bets on your personal life
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
