okay pat passed out under dana's car
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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