Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
you never un-have a 4some
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
