it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
