she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
