she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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