just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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