The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Small penises have feelings too.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
