i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
