So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
