Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Mom said you looked used
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
