she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
