i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
