Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
