On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
