You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Life without a bra equals bliss.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
