he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
