i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I need moral support for this bender
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
